Diseases/Conditions

Two Minutes in the Life of an Autism Mom

December 24, 2012 by admin in Vaccines with 13 Comments

As you go into this holiday season, run ragged by all you must do and keeping up with your kids, keep in mind what parents of autistic children deal with day in and day out. Then take an oath to assure it happens to no other families—or your own.

A Scream for Escape

by Lisa Joyce Goes

Today is Sunday, May 15th. My husband Dave took our daughter Mads to the museum in Springfield with my in-laws. I stayed home to potty train my 4 year old son with Autism, Noah, and my 3 year old neurotypical son, Liam.

It’s grey and miserably cold for May in Chicago so our frequent trips for breaks outside are not an option. I set out to take them both to the bathroom every half hour. This is a huge battle since our son Liam, while entirely capable of using the toilet, chooses not to because his big brother Noah, “not go”. So both scream, have a fit and cry, everytime I take them to the commode.

Liam sees Noah behaving this way, and while he is completely verbal and actually says, “Poop yuck. Change me,” he conforms his behavior to that of his older brother. I am thankful he was not with me in therapy last week when Noah humped an 11 year old girl while I tried to talk to his speech pathologist, or when he open-hand slapped my lovely neighbor across the face, who was guilty only of trying to keep him from running into the street.

Between potty breaks, I tried to get a jump on dinner for this evening. This was when Noah decided he had to use the bathroom. He went into the toliet area to take off his diaper and stripped off his clothes. (Putting his diaper and clothing back on after he has removed them is something we do up to 37 times a day.)

He then headed for my daughter’s room, where he promptly defecated all over her bed. He has been on an organic gluten-free/casein-free diet for a month, so his stools are strange, frequent, and always the consistency of liquid or oatmeal. This one was the latter and could have filled a quart-sized jar—a shocking quanitity, since he’d had three previous bowel movements already this morning. He took this foul smelling detritous and threw it on the ceiling, smeared it all over his face, the walls, and her shag carpeting.

He then ran into our room, with a lump of it on his leg, and rolled around in our white sheets and all over the bedspread. He dragged his poop-smeared hands along the walls and finished his tour-de-shit by smearing the last turds on his toy chest and books.

Noah then ran down the stairs and tackled his little brother Liam in a fit of laughter. This entire episode took less that 2 minutes, the time my PTS autism mom mind allows me to go before I shout throughout our 5,000 square foot, shit smeared house, “Where is Noah?”

2 minutes.

My friend Ginger’s son got out of their house last week and was 2 blocks down before he was discovered.

2 minutes.

I’m not gonna sugar coat it, our son Liam—he is going to have issues. This 2 minutes, I don’t know, it just … the vastness of the destruction, the amount of feces I clean on a daily basis, and Noah’s absolute inability to understand how truly disgusting it all is and the work that would be required to sanitize. Where to start? The shit in his mouth, his hair, or his sisters room? I dropped to my knees and just started sobbing. I mean, sobbing.

I have a really solid relationship with God, as I have been deathly sick and truly poor, two human conditions that get you on a first name basis with the almighty real quick. But this time, instead of my usual prayer for peace, “God, please be with me, this too shall pass, all things in time, I give this service up to you with a glad and grateful heart.” … This time I stared right up at the ceiling with my shit-covered clothes and cleaning supplies and I screamed, screamed!)

Fucking fix this! Fucking fix him damn it! Fix this! Fix it now! Fix this fucking house and fix this child because I am not enough and I cannot do it! What do you want from me? I can’t do this anymore!

Noah was still running around like a wild man walking through feces and spreading it all over the catwalk and the railing. I bent over, my face hitting a piece of carpet smeared with [you guessed it[ and just let it all go. Liam crawled out of his crib. (I put him in there in times like these to keep him safe and as poop free as possible.) He came over to me, patted my back and said, “It’s okay momma, it’s okay.”

On a side note, those who may feel I am dishonoring my son in some way by relaying these stories—the slapping and humping—it is imperative you understand those behaviors are not my Noah. Those actions are the product of a severely vaccine damaged neurological and central nervous system. He cannot and will not be held responsible for those actions. Just as we do not shout after veterans who’ve lost their legs in war, “Hey, Dude, can’t you walk straight?”

Don’t you dare consider telling my son to “mind.” He cannot. His mind has been destroyed. I simply care for what was left behind, the beautiful, delightful, and extraordinary soul of a little boy trapped in a body at war with itself.

I willingly and enthusiastically gave his thinking mind to Merck, Sanofi Pasteur and Wyeth without knowing they did not test their vaccines for combined effect. Noah is not to blame for my poor judgement and willingness to let those in white coats do my thinking for me.

Friends, you are about to see a whole slew of reports, data, and information that is designed to make you think autism has always been around. You are about to hear about all the promising new “treatments”—that is, drugs—that are in the works to help our kids.

I am guessing you are also going to see oodles and oodles of feel good stories about high functioning kids with autism—kids who can fly planes, drive firetrucks, give speechs and win marathons. These stories are wonderful and I applaud these children for their accomplishments. However, all of this is meant to keep you from thinking we have a real problem, a real epidemic on our hands.

I guarantee these children were not shitting themselves up to 9 times a day because of the measles in their gut. Then again, I don’t know. Maybe they were, but their parents got them to the right doctors and got them recovered. I guarantee you will not hear that part of the “feel good” story.

My son was irrevocably harmed by vaccines. I will fight for his recovery until my last breath, but God … God! I do not want this to happen to you.

Do not accept what archaic, out of touch institutions are trying to sell you in an effort to stay in business. Without you, they cannot exist. Every educator I meet tells me they have never seen so much autism or neurological dsyfunction. They lament systems incapable of handling the vast amounts of services these children require. Our doctors and nurses are getting it too. They have been opening their eyes … because it has begun to affect them and their families.

Please, as you review the information that will be pushed at you via popular news outlets, think about moms like me, who do not get paid to do this. And think about the commercials you see between news segments. Think about your trips for well-baby visits and the posters you see on the walls. And think about me, crying out to God, swearing like a sailor, trying with all my might just to make it through another day. I don’t want your pity. I want you to educate yourself and take action.

My Noah and all our kids will benefit immensely from you taking your healthcare and your children’s healthcare into your own hands. Do what is right for your family and never ever let someone else make important medical decisions like vaccination for you and your children.

Best, LJ Goes

LJ Goes is Managing Partner of The Misuta Project, LLC, an autism media company in search of the truth, in support of those pursuing it. She is a writer and autism advocate and mom to three children, Madeleine, Noah and Liam., which focuses on misrepresentations about autism.

Lisa is behind the video, Street Corner Autism Debate—a brilliant take-down of the pathetic arguments routinely spewed out to belittle autism and pretend it’s not the result of vaccines. Take a look:

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  • http://www.facebook.com/JrockingAnimeFreak Helen Imouto Chan

    I have been here with my son as well, hugs.

  • http://www.facebook.com/joan.campbell.507 Joan Campbell

    My heart goes out to you Lisa, don’t forget the pooh smearing is an ism and he will grow out of it. Greetings from Scotland and love you loads.

  • sarah

    do you have a transcript of all the info provided in this video that i can read? the voices were hard to understand. :/

  • DebbyBruck

    Thank you for providing this true story from Lisa Goes. I hope it will make an impression and help change the perspective on vaccinations and injury.

  • http://www.facebook.com/quest.love21 Quest Pickens

    Ive been praying about what to do with vaccines and somehow god led me here and im thankful for that my 1st son who is 1 is vaccinated so its been hard for his father and i to go with these decisions. Now I know that if we have anymore future children that i must do better by saying no. Idk care what kinds of papers i have to feel out i dont want to put my family at risk for longterm effects and like u said doctors are starting to see the effects because it is effecting them also

  • evedawn

    YOU fix it. Take it (health) into your own hands. I did for my little poop smearster: GAPS diet (means no grains), fermented foods (probiotics), GcMAF (repairs the broken part of immune system), chelate (AC protocol low, frequent dose), break down the biofilm (enzymes like lumbrokinase and natural anti-biotics), HBOT (multiplies stemcell activity, repairs).
    Go for it, I bet he can be whole again. He is young enough.

    • / Heidi Stevenson

      That something worked for you and your child does not mean it will work for another. A little sympathy, please, would be in order.

      Or are you suggesting that this mother is unaware and isn’t trying or hasn’t tried these methods? Please, offer suggestions – but don’t tell another mother that it’s her fault if her child doesn’t heal.

      As one other I know has said: Sure, she’s heard all those stories of cures. But she has yet to see one.

      Keep in mind, too, that it takes money to take advantage of any of these methods – and that includes the GAPS diet. Not all parents have it. Most don’t, in fact.

      • evedawn

        Wasn’t trying to be disrespectful or unsympathetic at all. I have been in the same boat and know how heart-wrenching and tiring the situation is. One that often seems hopeless. That is why I named several important therapies that (I believe) will help the majority of kids recover if started young enough. Just as awareness needs to be created about the risks of vaccinations, there also needs to be awareness created about how to recover our kids;-)
        The money-thing I know too. We sold our house to pay for therapies.

        • http://www.facebook.com/kittymaierchristo Kitty Christo

          Ok so what if all your kid will eat for years is bread with pb, raisins and milk? Should I just take the milk and bread away and give him pb on a spoon and raizins. This is years and years after trying to expand his diet using special therapies etc…His diet has actually declined.I love how this suggestion seems so easy and so smug.”He won’t starve himself”.Riiiiight love hearing that because he does and will even when he’s so hungry his stomach hurts”.

  • http://www.facebook.com/PatsyHarmanProfile Patsy Harman

    Peace to you moms….I will remind myself of the poop story the next time I get irritated or worried about something trivial in my kids-all-sortof-grown up life. Peace. Peace. Peace, if only in your exhausted sleep.

  • http://www.facebook.com/akinsholisticnutrition Stacee Akins NC

    been there, still there….my son is now 17, its been hell, thanks for speaking out. God has got me through, and well get me (us) through. Blessings, Stacee

  • fpomc osteopathic

    Yes, been there and still there too! I am tired, just cleaned up another poop attack. He is 8, smeared the library as if nothing is wrong had tried to clean it with books and speech cards, tables,…then sat calmly in front of fire place…his sister informed me and I started the cleaning … It is a Hell. He is potty trained somehow! Sits but 50% smears, passing gas may poop then walks around with it and one time was even tasting it! All this is happening while he has picked up great deal in language, biking, recognizing cards at 100% but this still is not better. Even dogs get trained but these poor kids despite this much ABA, life time trainings, educations, due to their brain issue, can’t!
    I have a large shampooed, colorox, $1000 steamer..full at work but just think at 10 pm I am tired for janitorial .. Just tired.

  • cheryl sadler

    i don’t think it’s vaccines. i don’t think it’s dietary. we’ve all
    had vaccines. we all ate bread and drank milk, (two things i’m always
    seeing blamed for autism). you are all welcome to graph this yourself.
    no one wants to admit this, because we can’t fix it. and we don’t want
    to give up our own collection of devices, but autism totally escalated
    at the beginning of the new millenium. what does this coincide with? not
    vaccines, or gluten.

    it coincides with the explosion of
    electronics in the home and outside. everything is wireless now, and
    that started increasing exponentially at the turn of the century. where
    do you think these ‘signals’ are, that your devices communicate on?
    obviously they’re in our atmosphere, in our homes. there are studies
    showing this, but who the fuck needs a study? you just need to graph it
    for yourself.

    i’ve seen articles blaming milk and telling
    distraught parents to use soy. then on the same google search, i’ll see
    articles telling you that soy is bad. all i know is we grew up drinking
    milk with every meal, no one worried about gluten, and who the hell knew
    any autistic kids? virtually NO ONE.

    ditto for vaccines. we ALL
    got vaccinated against EVERYTHING. if you don’t, perhaps smallpox comes
    back. i don’t know why mercury is necessary as a preservative, and that
    needs to be banned, but it is not the cause. my children, born in the
    80′s, got all of those vaccines, as did all other kids in their age
    group, and STILL…autism was not an epidemic. there is only ONE possibility that will actually correlate to the explosion of autism diagnoses.

    no one really wants to accept this, because, again, you can’t fix the
    o utdoor transmission of these invisible communication waves, and by the
    time you figure out your child has autism…usually around three….it’s
    too late to guard him against the electronic crap in your home…the
    communication centers in his brain are developing quickly between 1 and 3
    yrs of age. think about what you’ve got:

    flat screen tvs with wireless remotes..computers…smart phones..etc etc ad nauseum.

    i’ve
    got that stuff too. i’m grandmother to an autistic child, and i tire of
    my son cutting out milk, or bread or whatever the article of the week
    tells him what dietary source is to blame.

    i don’t blame
    parents or grandparents, because..who tells you this stuff? no one. so
    unless MORE studies are done with less regards to diet, or ‘cures’ like
    lupron, the issue won’t be out there.
    again we can’t stop
    what is transmitted across the country, and the globe. but if the
    suspicion that electronic waves are seriously considered for a cause to
    autism, maybe we can cut down on our kids exposures to those within our
    homes.
    i’m sorry i sound angry about this, but i’m tired of hearing about everything EXCEPT the very thing that needs more studies, and to have those studies published, so people can make choices. i think there’s fear for those industries, wireless transmissions are used for virtually everything, and imagine the uproar if this were an accepted cause. with the vaccines, even the pharmaceutical companies don’t panic because it’s not like vaccines are their only products. and as for bread and milk, etc, plenty of other people are going to consume these commodities.
    seriously. think about it. cell phone radiation is really screwing up the navigation skills of bees. why on earth wouldn’t it fuck with a developing child’s brain?

    there are a few links surfacing.
    this is one.
    http://www.occupylv.org/topics/link-between-wireless-technology-and-rise-autism

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